Every moment of life, in this human body, is a miracle.

Each day it’s a gift to wake up and be alive.

Reasonable statements right?

Yet, we’re taught, particularly as women, that age is bad. 

With age, we lose desirability.
With age, we lose our beauty.
With age, we lose relevance. 

So we chase the fountain of youth, a fountain that is 100% illusion.

I bought into all of the above, spending so much of my life feeling shame and even fear around my age. I remember it starting when I turned 29 and felt like a terrible clock was ticking. 

Tick tock, getting old. 

It amplified ALOT when I turned 40…
“You look young Leanne, hide it, try not to tell anyone,  old IS bad.”
Shame is the feeling. Shame! What a trip to feel shame around being alive.

Why do many of us feel shame? Living another day and another year IS a gift…

Tick tock, still getting older.
Losing value. Losing beauty. And… believing it.


Sadly, we’re groomed to feel “less than” if we’re not “young” 

Body image and the quest for eternal youth is not a new topic, the struggle is real!

It starts young, very young. Many of us have worked hard over the years to help adolescent young women in middle school and high school to see the illusion we are being marketed.


The roots are deep and the dollars spent perpetuating the illusion are many.

Non-stop messages from the media teach us that we are not enough.

It’s so hard to let go of the buy-in!

Who even decided that aging is a bad thing?

In some eras and in some cultures, to age is to be revered. Wisdom is cherished. Each cycle around the sun is a victory of receiving another opportunity to live.

As I’m writing this a Facebook memory pops up, confirming that I’ve been thinking about this for a while now.

To me, this post is powerful, truthful, and liberating. It received only a few likes and loves.

We’ve sure got a long way to go toward accepting the TRUE BEAUTY of the human experience, without filters and photoshop…

The good news is I get to decide. I sure don’t feel my age!


This year, I’m taking a stand for myself and all women…

I found myself aware of a choice point… do I continue to hide hoping to appear younger? 

Do I chase or not chase the illusionary fountain of youth? 
Do I continue fearing age and likely crack under the pressure and grief of my self-perceptions?
Do I chase something that’s just not possible?

Fuck that, I say no more!

I choose to reject the messages and norms that tell me and my sisters to loathe aging.


I choose to stay healthy, vital and strong AND I choose to  bust through the brutal beliefs I have been attempting to run from for most of my life.

We are blessed with life and anything other than celebrating our human being robs us of that precious gift.


Tick tock… I am here!
Tick tock… I am alive!

Tick tock… I value each season of life I’ve lived!

Tick tock… I cherish each moment I am blessed to experience.

Tick tock… I see my beauty and won’t let anyone take it away again!

I’m placing  my crown where it belongs and owning my beauty!


On November 26, Thanksgiving Day, I turned 55.

I’m standing tall and owning this…
I have been on this earth for 55 years
I feel more alive and connected to myself and life than ever before! 

I am stepping in and claiming my queen-age years!
Join me sisters, you are straight up beautiful in all of the seasons of womanhood.

To all of the kings, queens, princes and princesses out there

Yes, I’m talking to you!
It’s time to put your damn crowns on and always remember…

You ARE beautiful. 


I AM beautiful. 

We ARE  beautiful.


PS: I see you and I’m sending waves of love your way! And just because… here is what 55 looks like in my world!

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Leanne is a local San Diegan committed to creating healthy community experiences that ignite authentic communication, self-discovery, friendship, and professional connections. She is a facilitator, speaker, and writer. Leanne is known for her ability to create safe spaces for small and large groups where truth, transformation, and connection happen. Her knowledge base includes emotional literacy, communication, leadership, mindfulness, grief, trauma, bereavement, surf therapy, PTSD, community, conflict resolution, and personal development. You can reach her at leannetibiatowski@gmail.com

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